Monday, 26 July 2010

Anaphora For Anna Fourier

So I might have left the milk out overnight. So what?

So I might have developed hay fever symptoms over the week. Doesn’t mean I have to replace the milk.

So I might have participated in the Forge of the Wordsmiths event on Saturday. It might have went well, or it might have been a disaster. In fact – it did go well – apart from the disasters.

So I might have a friend called Anna Fourier. Or maybe she’s more of an acquaintance. Or face from the distant past. Maybe I never knew her at all, and she now has kids and stuff.

So I might have found the Season 7 finale of Curb Your Enthusiasm the pinnacle of metanarrative in television.

So I might have phoned your sister at 2AM in a drunken rage. Or maybe I don’t drink at all. Maybe I am a perpetual teenager addicted to carbonated beverages.

So I might have to explain that anaphora are successive phrases with identical beginnings. Maybe that’s obvious now.

So I might have to say that reading in public wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. Maybe I even liked it. No, that’s ridiculous. Maybe I would do it again – though maybe (probably) not.

So I might have to give Anna Fourier a call, ask her to read this blog post. Maybe she would find it cute. Maybe she’d find me cute, and we could replace the milk together. Is that a euphemism?

So I might have to stop now. Maybe anaphora is a type of spreadable cheese in another universe. Maybe Georges Perec is black in that universe. Maybe I am still white, but talented on harp.

So I might have to declare that I use too much toilet paper. Three sheets instead of two folded over. Even the quilted stuff. I am an eco-nightmare.

So I might have to apologise for that. Though I gather the observation has a certain universality.

So I might have to say that my story "Breathe In, Breathe Out" is in the Caught By Darkness anthology. Maybe that link goes to Amazon. Or maybe Amazon goes to that link.

So I might have to say goodnight and good luck, whatever that means.

So I might have to ask, do you have any milk I can borrow?


  1. So I might have to say it is fairly obvious that all the comments to this post will start in the same anaphoric way as your post did.

    So I might have to admit I really like that.

    So I might have to confess I had never even heard the word anaphora.

    So I might have to accept that there are certain limits to having learnt English in Norwegian schools.

    So I might have to inform you that I don't think sending milk across oceans is a good idea.

    So I might have to skip on that one.

  2. "So" is nearly as shitty a word as "But".
    You are playing here, however in everyday use "So what?" "So I..." nearly always is used to negate responsibility.
    Just thought I'd say that.
    Nice post.

  3. Georges Perec's "Je me souviens" is when this anaphora busines began. Since then, literally tens of people have tried it. I'll take my chances with that milk. Send it me!

    Mike: Erm. OK. Thanks.

  4. So I might have been inspired to have anaphora on pita for lunch, and I might have found it quite tasty.

    So I might have been amused and chuckled, but then I might have wondered about this strange milk flirtation occurring with certain Scandenavian countires.

    So I might want to congratulate you on your short story pub, but I might not know quite how to go about it in silly prose...

  5. Hey, Mark! Great news about "Breathe in, Breathe out"! Sorry about the milk.

  6. Hello Tart and Chris! Are you two having an affair? You always show up together. No, hang on, that can't be right...